Why should Pontiac's iconic Screaming Chicken hood decal be restricted to Malaise Era Trans Ams, or even Pontiacs? Your '87 Hyundai Excel or '93 Buick LeSabre deserves a four-foot-wide Screaming Chicken, and now you can afford one!

I became aware of this development while working at the Arse Freeze-A-Palooza 24 Hours Of LeMons 2009; two teams were sporting the Chickens Of Screamage on their cars' hoods (a Mercedes-Benz W201 and a '73 Ford Capri), and they claimed to have purchased them dirt cheap. My former employer has excellent-quality reproductions available, but they're not exactly what you'd call cheap, and who needs excellent quality when you're just going to slap the thing on the Bondo'd-out hood of some low-budget hoopty? Here comes eBay to the rescue! Yes, for $44.00 shipped, you can have a two-tone Screaming Chicken decal, in a bewildering variety of not-found-on-real-Trans-Ams colors. Damn near 16 square feet of awesomeness– I may have to get one for every car in the MM Motor Pool!