Do you like fried food and German cars? Need something that will see you through society's collapse? Well, Nice Price or Crack Pipe has a Mercedes diesel that will get you through the economic downturn smelling like Micky-Dees.
Yesterday, the fifteen grand Cimarron was blindsided by an overwhelming 95% Crack Pipe vote, sending it scuttling back from whence it came to lick its wounds, and perhaps lower its expectations. Today, we're going eco-friendly with a blue, but not Bluetec, Benz.
Driving a modern diesel is little different from driving one of their spark-fired brethren, but that wasn't always the case. Before there was Bluetec; before low-sulfur fuel and oxidization catalysts; there was simply Rudolf Christian Karl Diesel's soot-spewing, can of marbles sounding, compression-ignition engine. Providing the greatest thermal efficiency of any internal combustion engine, the high-compression and slow burn rate creates the classic diesel sound, and makes them some of the most efficient motors around. And today we are contemplating one of the best of them.
Like cockroaches and plastic shopping bags, the W123 Mercedes Benz will outlive us all. James May successfully drove one across the barren wastes of Africa, despite losing much of the unbolt-able fiddly bits along the way, and having to suffer the indignities heaped upon it by Clarkson and the hyperthyroidic Hammond.
Powered by the biblically durable OM617 five-cylinder diesel of 3 litre capacity, the 300CD was originally bought by sensible people who pined for something better than a Volvo. Today, Earth-Firsters like them for their un-temperamental nature when run on distilled Crisco and used clearasil pads. But with only 80 noisy little ponies bouncing around under the hood, driving will probably take some some forethought- avoiding short on-ramps, and looking for boy scouts to help you across busy intersections.
This $3,900 300CD, like all the W123 coupes, rides on a 106.7 inch wheelbase, shorter than the 110" of the sedan. It does share the four-door's commodious boot, and secure, but uninspiring handling. To its benefit, it appears unaffected by the tin worm, and the seller lists a plethora of new parts and recent services to sweeten the deal. He also details what is currently not functioning, including rear windows which must remain raised for fear of blowing a fuse, and the fact that it lacks working A/C. Proving how authentically old school this car really is, the seller is willing to FAX you the receipts for the past two years worth of work done to the car.
He doesn't say whether or not it comes with the roof-rack or surfboard, but you could probably cut a deal on either, should you happen to aspire to be Matthew Mcconaughey-like. The ad says that it can run on both straight diesel and vegan's-delight bio-fuel. Whichever you chose, you'll need to wait for those glow plugs to warm up before cranking the five-cylinder to life, and when you do you'll probably want to be in a well-ventilated space as these cars put out more soot than Dick Van Dyke's makeup man.
So, does this beach vegan make you want to whip out your hemp wallet and write the seller a check for $3,900 in earth-friendly ink? Or does his idea of the cost for a sustainable energy future make you think that the crack he's been smoking may just be a gateway drug, and this Benz is clattering on the other side of crazy?
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