The Woodward Dream Cruise attracted over one million cruisers and car-obsessed nuts. That's a lot of eyes for advertisers to drool over. While some pitches were good, many were not. Here's some of the worst. We call it "Badvertising."

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS


Prostate exam! Cruisers, come and get your FREE prostate exam! While they're spot on with the target demographic, it's leaves a bad taste in our mouth... Er, doesn't sit well with us... .

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS

Vine oil? No idea what that is, but it couldn't hurt to get it changed, I suppose.

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS


Aren't monster trucks themselves practically rolling billboards to begin with? Substituting a real truck for an inflatable truck advertising Firestone tires has a certain element of the surreal.

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS


Ponderosa "Steak" House isn't high on the list of restaurants we've prayed to see turned into a mobile feed bag, and just thinking about a piping hot plate of ten-hour-old macaroni and cheese served out of a converted police-horse trailer got rid of our hunger, perhaps forever.

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS


Wait, didn't we already cover the free prostate exam?

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS

Here's a tip admeisters - if you want people to pay attention to an ad touting yet another social media website placed amidst a sea of hot rods and muscle cars, sloppily bungee-cord it to something other than a Dodge Avenger.

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS

Elvii? Really? There's a lot of unfortunate Cosplay that goes on at the Dream Cruise, but this use of the image of Elvis to sell exercise equipment, a man admittedly not known for fitness in his later years, seems poorly planned, especially on the anniversary of his death. If you want to scare us into fitness, put one of them on a toilet.

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS


Despite all outward appearances, this is not an advertisement for industrial grade LSD. No, its an eye-catching car pitching a local mega haunted house, and considering the must-look nature of the thing, plus the fact the kids seemd to like it, it's probably the most successful of the badvertisements.

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS

Your opinions on the subject may vary, but these stalwarts of good-time-ruination are always present at Woodward. Apparently, they believe gross-out tactics at massive celebrations are the best way to win hearts and minds short of going to churches and shooting people who disagree with them.

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS

TheDivorceGuy.com? Classy, sure, but can this possibly work for him? Who is going to look at this and think "Oh, yeah! You know what I need? A divorce!"

Badvertising Of The Woodward Dream CruiseS

This is actually an example of "Goodvertising" but only in that those little chicken bites look so tasty. The wordplay, however, leaves a bit something to be desired. Next time, Wendy's, don't try to be our friend. Just use the picture. People actually will look up and think "Oh, yeah! You know what I need? Delicious chicken!"