Of course we realize that the books were cooked on that 58 MPG figure; the old EPA test had about as much to do with real-world driving as the image of Sea Monkeys has to do with real brine shrimp. Still, though, the '82 Sentra sipped gas through a cocktail straw, and entry-level econoboxes 26 years later are guzzling the stuff by comparison. Would present-day car buyers find this Datsun intolerably loud, cramped, and bouncy, pissing themselves in terror every time an Expedition loomed in their field of vision… and what's with the hand-cranked windows and lack of air conditioning? Yeah, a car like this would have no chance today, but let's see what happens when gas hits 10 bucks per!

Send an email to Murilee Martin, the author of this post, at murilee@jalopnik.com.