Novelties, ford mustang, muscle car wars, mustang, mustang church...

Mustang Church Puts The Fun Back Into Fundamentalism

Scripture tells us to "do justice, love kindness and walk humbly with your God," though perhaps we can now add to that "burn rubber in a Mustang." Welcome to the Mustang Church of American and Museum, a church-cum-museum dedicated to saving the soul and evangelizing the Ford Mustang. The 7,000-square-foot facility near Franklin, Kansas is the dream of Mustang-fanatic and retired math teacher Charles Ales. When completed the facility will hold weekly services, Mustang blessings, car shows and swap meets. Said Ales, this is "the only church in the world dedicated to the Mustang car and Jesus Christ." Ales and his son are ordained by the Universal Ministries School of Theology, which is the same church that ordained one of my stoner pals from college for $5, making this church as legitimate as Joel Olsteen's Lakewood Church.

The sanctuary will include eight of Ales' own Mustangs, including a 1966 convertible, three Boss Stangs (including a rare 429) and four new Shelby Mustangs. it looks like loving cars has turned from a cult into a religion, meaning it may be time to change our tagline. For more photos and information surf over to TomStrongman.com. [TomStrongman.com]

5:20 PM on Fri May 2 2008
By Matt Hardigree
1,147 views
38 comments

Comments

tenbeers at 05:34 PM on 05/02/08
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Lemme just get this out of the way real quick - WWJD?
selfhatingotaku at 05:34 PM on 05/02/08
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The Devil drives a Honda.
Mike the Dog at 05:35 PM on 05/02/08
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@tenbeers: Apparently, a Mustang.
BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯ�... at 05:36 PM on 05/02/08
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Even beeing an atheist this is blasphemy
LTDScott, Porcubimmer... at 05:37 PM on 05/02/08
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@tenbeers: A Fury, duh.
tenbeers at 05:41 PM on 05/02/08
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I dunno guys

Jer 46:15
Why are thy Valiant men swept away? They stood not, because the LORD did drive them.

so we're at 2-1 mopar here

/agnostic
John Krewson at 05:41 PM on 05/02/08
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Second Kings chapter 9 verse 20.
graverobber- Same... at 05:48 PM on 05/02/08
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I would imagine they would consider the Mustang II to be a false profit.
UDMan at 05:51 PM on 05/02/08
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So, Pastor Ales (Father Ales, Preacher Ales, Reverend Ales?) Has a church dedicated to Jesus, and the Mustang. He takes collections (donations, bribes, whatever) and lo and behold, he owns a Boss 429 Mustang, and four (count 'em, four) Brand New Shelby Mustangs.

Forgive me for saying this, but how in the HELL is he getting away with this tax dodge?
vr6john at 05:52 PM on 05/02/08
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wrong wrong wrong...Jesus would drive a bug...

But he would certainly be a guest Pastor at the Mustang Church of American.

The Church of John Coltrane was near my house but they had to move to another part of the City [edition.cnn.com]
beercheck at 05:58 PM on 05/02/08
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What time does the lions show start?
beercheck at 05:59 PM on 05/02/08
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@UDMan: No Dodge, no dodge.
discontinuuity at 05:59 PM on 05/02/08
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I can just see old Chuck saying "the only church dedicated to the Mustang car...oh, and Jesus Christ too, I guess."
Mike the Dog at 06:01 PM on 05/02/08
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@vr6john: "The Church of John Coltrane"? Do they use heroin as a sacrament?
vr6john at 06:06 PM on 05/02/08
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@Mike the Dog: I think had a spiritual awakening at one point and recovered from his substance abuse. He checked out a bunch of religions during that point and was consulting with a Hindu healer when he did die of liver failure
Dave7 at 06:10 PM on 05/02/08
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I wonder if they warn of the evils of Camaro ownership ...
Vintage Racer at 06:12 PM on 05/02/08
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@UDMan:

I think you nailed it...
DrJimmy at 06:16 PM on 05/02/08
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My ordination only set me back $3.00, and it wasn't that long ago.

I'll perform your marriage ceremony with y'all in your ragtop Mustang, as long as it isn't a Mustang II.

There is no convertible Mustang II? Great!
smoke~ at 06:17 PM on 05/02/08
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Nobody could take 40 years to get out of Egypt unless they were driving a Brirish made Mustang.
smoke~ at 06:30 PM on 05/02/08
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@smoke~:
Brirish = British after the elections.
Mike the Dog at 06:56 PM on 05/02/08
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@vr6juan: Yeah, I followed the link after I made that comment. Boy, do I feel foolish...
UDMan at 08:05 PM on 05/02/08
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I think I would be a follower if he was the pastor of The Mustang Ranch!
$Image of Gram\'s Caddy$ Gram's Caddy at 09:53 PM on 05/02/08
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@BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ: For once, I agree with an Atheist!
Jesus died on the Cross so that we could be delivered from sin's shackles. NOT so that we could make Him share His throne with a car! (and a poorly-built one at that)

Pretty disgusting concept, really.
mytdawg at 10:30 PM on 05/02/08
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I guess Jesus did return... Oh man I smell a Special Edition. Plastic Dashboard Jesus Edition Mustang. It comes blessed. Has a sacrament holder. A bluetooth confessional built into it's Synch thingie. Holy water in the radiator. Crosses stitched into the upholstery. Tachometer stops at 6659 RPM. The four stations are on the shock towers.

Dang.

Hahahahahahaaaa
TRAMS_AM at 10:35 PM on 05/02/08
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@Benz250S: No, no, he's not sharing the throne with a Mustang, he's using it as a MIGHTY and RIGHTEOUS seat to DELIVER JUSTICE and MERCY, TEARING ACROSS THE VAST WASTELANDS AT BIBLICAL SPEEDS, HEALING LEPERS with FRENCH CARS and FORGIVING INNOCENT and MISGUIDED YOUNG MEN for owning FRONT WHEEL DRIVE SOULLESS APPLIANCES. ALL HAIL TO HIS MIGHT AND HIS HUMBLE and POWERFUL FORD MUSTANG!
tenbeers at 10:44 PM on 05/02/08
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@TRAMS_AM: JESUS H TAPDANCING CHRIST I HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT!
Novaload at 11:30 PM on 05/02/08
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Thou shalt have no other Ford before thee.
TRAMS_AM at 11:39 PM on 05/02/08
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@tenbeers: Nice!

You get wise. You get to church!
Astos at 03:33 AM on 05/03/08
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Charles Ales is confused and has too much time on his hands. Curious though whether he'll find other people with his fixation who'll come to his church for worship.

Astos Green lasers rulz
Jinn at 08:36 AM on 05/03/08
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Mustang über Ales ?
p3p3 at 11:09 AM on 05/03/08
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Mustang Jesus. I hope Hollywood picks up on this.
68stang at 11:59 AM on 05/03/08
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I'm as big a Mustang fan as you can get, but this makes me want to change my name to 68Camaro.
milo_carrera at 02:02 PM on 05/03/08
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@68stang: Ditto that. Also, I doubt his true faith given that the '66 vert he has Jesus driving doesn't even appear to be a 289.
buckminster at 05:11 PM on 05/03/08
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@Mike the Dog: You obviously never heard 'Trane's album, "A Love Supreme". It's sublime.
amblito at 10:15 AM on 05/04/08
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Coltrane's Om contains chants from a Hindu book.
mr.chöppèrs at 04:04 PM on 05/04/08
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So if I was to crash a Mustang, would that make me an iconoclast?
dulcamara at 07:24 PM on 05/04/08
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I was ordained a ULC minister in 1969. The rumor at the time was that you could get out of the draft if you'd been ordained as early as 1967. I still have my ULC credentials(?) taped to my file cabinet in my office.

At the time of my ordination I got a flyer from ULC with pictures of other ULC elite clergy. These fine beings included a dog, a fish, and several humans who made the dog and fish look pretty good.

As for the musical comments above, I saw an opera sung in Sanscrit on Thursday, which was amazingly good.

Hare Krishna to all.
crazygutgut at 11:55 AM on 05/05/08
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Here is another installment in my series of "unfortunate Gawker artist ads"