I'm baffled. Even in a garage, in Ohio... this defies logic.

@acarr260: hermetically sealed?

Good Lord, will you look at that rat's nest under the hood. Is that all smog gear?

@Monaco: Nobody knows and I don't think anyone ever did.

Wow. How one would even attempt at fixing something in that engine bay with mess of hoses and wiring harnesses is beyond me.

Is the ultra-blurry pic of the dash really showing an OEM choke knob...in 1982?!?!?!?

If so, that's too freakin' cool.

And that hose-mess is how it left the factory. Which means SOMEONE looked at that clusterfuck and said, "THERE. That's how it should be. Let's sell it just like that."

That person needs to be taken out and shot.

@Pope Dearthair the Awesometh: Hopefully the cirrhosis already killed them.

(Figuring booze is the only way that could happen...seriously, would the discerning consumers of 1982 not pay an extra dollar per car for some hose/wire looms?)

You guys might want to check out the last comment on yesterday's post.

You'll see.

Also: Ben, please tell us you're shopping for a companion to the Lincoln.

@Mad_Science: my dad dropped a 351 Windsor into an '82 F250 once when I was young. The truck was from CA originally. we measured the wiring... 300 feet - left over after the transplant!

$4,000 US, if it's off the showroom fuckin' floor, is too much for this.

Now, were it an '81 Eagle 4x4 wagon.... Well....

Oooh, I want the one Car & Driver tweaked back in the very early-80's.

I'm sitting here in Cincinnati, a mere 20 minutes from this car, trying my damndest to decide how weak my will would be if I went to see this car in person. I think I'd better hide my wallet from myself tonight. Think he'd take $3200? No...nevermind...I don't want to know.

@Kelly: Thank the dragon gods it isn't a wagon. I'd have to buy it for sure.

@Mad_Science: good catch... yall :)

also, what the hell? why is there a 3 pron plug in there?
[jalopnik.com]

@Kelly: No, that's the 4WD switch. The first year or two, the Eagle only had full-time 4WD; they made part-time standard later. You pull down on the knob, then slide the lever either left or right.

@damnElantra: Engine block heater?

Whoa, you mean engaging 4wd means maniputating not one, but two controls?? Of differing styles, no less. One a push/pull knob, the other a sliding lever.

I'm having an Apoplectic Motor Convulsion fit.

It's a shock there aren't more of these in Colorado ditches, abandoned due to their complexity.

@instrumentofaction:

It's a trip, but there are wagons sitting front yards with plows on the nose... Shop only in neighborhoods above 10K feet of elevation with dirt roads as the major thoroughfare.

@Kelly: Yup, but you have to realize that the vacuum switch wasn't yet perfected in 1982.

@Kelly: I believe the 4wd engagement is a combination of vacuum and thermal swtiches or something ridiculous.

@Mad_Science: It's not so mysterious:

Wonder Twin powers activate!

Shape of an AMC Hornet.

Form of a Jeep comanche 4X4 drivetrain.

@Kelly: The black one that looks like a manual choke is the fresh air vent knob. Just pull for fresh unheated air straight from outside..

@damnElantra: Battery tender type charger. If it was plugged in all that time, the battery might be good?

@Mad_Science: The actual switching is vacuum operated and there are little vacuum hard lines EVERYWHERE under the hood.

Love the "Turbo Jet" dash vents, and the under dash shelf that will actually hold stuff when you go around corners.

I want to know what that rusty door propped up against the barn is from. What else is lurking on this property?

@DannyBN:

I believe AMC called it "the Eagle Switch".

I think everybody should go back to the original post (handy link in text above) and read the comment by countryboyohio (near the end).

It might be real, it might be a hoax, but either way, its absolutely precious.

An all-time great.

@lascauxcaveman:
Oh dear, you said "precious", I feel more warm and fuzzy than laughing.

Oddly, a friend of mine bought one of these in or around 1992 (it's kinda fuzzy) in red over black with black graphics. And a three-speed manual on the floor. So don't fall for the auto.

A bad-tempered bridge embankment jumped out in front of it not long after he got it. Don't trust those bridges.

Someone took good care of it. Those are some genuine Dayco Top Cog belts from 1987 and there's a high-end Standard "Blue Streak" distributor cap shining out from the mess of hoses. None of that cheap crap from Kragen.

@Mad_Science: Well, he "lived in Ohio his hole life" so I guess that explains that.
I like his assumption that a barn is the equivalent of Swiss bank vault with climate control. In most barns the mouse and birdshit alone will kill a car in time. Obviously the car door leaning against said barn (I guess--in the later post) was NOT secured in the barn vault.

@Kelly: You pull the knob, then stroke the lever. You have to move your hand before the gear lube squirts out.

@DoctorNine:

I'm glad I don't have any beverages near the keyboard at this moment...

@Kelly: My '85 RX-7 has one.

@lascauxcaveman: I guess I've been reading too many posts on the Cincinnati craigslist because Countryboyohio's post seemed completely legible and without spelling or grammatical error. That's when you know its time to step away from the computer. Can I get a jalop IP address check in aisle 13? If he's for real I feel I should help by donating to whatever insitution helps people like him.

@Kelly: I'm not sure if by "trip" you meant "Timothy Leary" or "1000-mile-car-dolly-barn-find-from-hell". Either way, you're absolutely spot on.

I think Jalop should do a shopping guide for car-buyers based on geographic anomalies. For instance, we all know Alameda is the center of the universe for automotive suspended animation but are there otherworldly forces at work collecting certain cars in certain locations? Can you only shop for Alfas in certain towns posessing a certain patient and knowledgable mechanic? Do you find more overly modified saturn winged monstrosities in towns with more AutoZone stores per capita?

Ahh, if only I had 4 grand. It needs to be more like $1200...

@DoctorNine: After that, do you choke or go lean? I'd probably end up sputtering; the whole thing is a bit hard for me to swallow. Pre-ignition can sometimes be a factor, too.

I found a Concord for $500 [tampa.craigslist.org]

Or you can get a retired post office Jeep with an "aroogah" horn. [tampa.craigslist.org]

Who are these "bench racers" that countryboyfromohio speaks of?? Are people strapping SBC's to their unsuspecting workbenches and taking them out for drags or autocross circuits? I'm thinking that we have a pretty sturdy welding bench at home that would be a good start if this is the case. Go Bench Racer, Go!

@acarr260: I don't doubt it .. after all, there are barstool races!

Wow, three posted articles spawned from one tip. Do I get a t-shirt? 'cuz I'd wear it proudly and frquently.

@scottcom36: That feature was a handy side effect of AMC being the last automaker to integrate A/C vents into their dashboards. If you didn't spring for A/C, you didn't get the vents and shelf, either.

@Mike the Dog: I miss those old-style vents that actually brought fresh air into the car.

I'll bet this thing has a floor-mounted dimmer switch, too.

Man, I can't blow four grand on an AMC Eagle. But that car is cherry, and only about 40 miles away...

I wonder what he'd say if I offered him 2000?

/irrational

@MarionCobretti: He'd probably tell you to stick it in the "cock holster."

@instrumentofaction: I definitely think there are some geographical oddities at play. Some areas just seem to collect certain types of cars. No rhyme or reaosn to it, as near as I can tell.

@mechimike: In my neighborhood, we've got 90's Subaru AWD wagons stacked like cordwood.