Jalopnik
Take note: You do not mess with the motorheads at Beyond.ca unless you want 46,000 righteously angry, resourceful, and tech-savvy Canadians on the lookout for you. This is especially true if you're an easily recognizable eight-fingered stoner who's too stupid to stash one of the more visible and distinctive cars in Calgary. Before long you'll have an unflattering new nickname and a target on your back that — thanks to Google Maps — is almost literally visible from orbit.
Take note: You do not mess with the motorheads at Seems the car thief in question showed up to test-drive Shaun Ironside's car, a right-hand-drive 1991 JDM Skyline GT-R — not exactly a low-profile ride — and never came back. Now it so happens that Ironside, in addition to being a clever enough fellow to get a JDM Skyline into Calgary, was plenty observant enough to notice that the Albertan Einstein in question had only eight fingers, and resourceful enough to post his description on the Beyond.ca forums. After that, it was only a matter of time until his eventual capture, which while merely the dénouement of the epic, is still very satisfying. [Wired, YouTube]
Comments
Clawsome.
8 finger discount gets you caught every time. Kids - don't steal!
Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You steal my car. Prepare to die.
What can I say, Canadians are fucking awesome.
Ironically, I met a guy named Shaun from southern Alberta with a JDM Skyline GT-R. I wonder if it's him.
@bee zee arr: QOTN (quote of the night)
so before you sell your ride, because you're going to die or someone is holding your family hostage, you have to lo-jack it, otherwise you're playing russian roulette with 5 bullets in a six shooter.
@kingfling: I wonder where/how he got his two finger discount?
This ancient marking thing is really a good idea. From this morning I will never trust an amputee.
HA. To every bully who popped the back of my neck, every football star who thought he was the cock of the walk and I was the sidewalk, every smug bastard who believed he deserved more than he earned, I present this.
Assholes get what they deserve.
And this one will get a special friend in the showers.
Way to go Gimpy! It's gonna be pretty hard to get that soap off the jail's shower floor with a digit deficiency.
He lives his life eight fingers at a time...
At least the cops will save money on finger print ink.
Right after stealing the car...
"Holy shit man, I can't believe you stole this car!!!"
"Yeah Dude, High Fours!"
"Uhh, (shivers) maybe later man."
Hello John Krewson, welcome to Jalopnik.com.
Hahaha, the "West Coast Choppers" t-shirt is totally appropriate.
I don't think that kid cares eh.
I still don't get it. I've never felt an urge to take something that wasn't mine. And being a relatively not-stupid in-duh-vidual, I realize that now more than ever, monitoring hardware is everywhere. There is no anonymity to be had. Steal a car? Sure, if I was the last man on earth, maybe. Otherwise it would feel like, well...
stealing.
With a last name like that shouldn't he be planning ahead and stealing wheelchairs?
@elhigh:
Agreed this guy was a dousche who got what he deserves, but I miss the connection to people who may have "picked on" you?
I'll go out on a limb and guess this dude wasn't finger-bangin the prom queen in HS. (gross huh?)
@rlj676:
I'll go out on a limb and guess this dude wasn't finger-bangin the prom queen in HS.
Or perhaps that's how he lost them:
+ Watch video
smell my finger eh
I wonder if he suffered from shocker envy?
2 in the pink and 1 in the.....shit I don't have enough fingers...sorry babe.
For someone with his disability he sure knows how to get in the backseat of the cruiser.
The story on Wired has all the details, and man, it's HILARIOUS. What a dope.
Judging by the video, that man has experience getting into the back of a police car while handcuffed. I mean, he didn't even hit his head.
Who is John Krewson? Le Jaloptern?
@graverobber- my star is on the inside:
Well ain't that some disturbing stuff.
@rlj676: A common element among the popular kids was that, aside from being cruelest to us square-peggers, they were also the ones who got caught doing the most illegal things. Maybe not where you were, but certainly where I was.
It's weird, too: most of them were from upper-middle class families, no reason to steal. Just looking to pry a little more excitement out of life, maybe, or some attention from parents beyond just, "How's school? Good, good."
figures - Yankee fan.
it's not 4 fingers on each hand, one hand only has 3. read the story!
that is one HARDCORPS canadian accent on that vid...
@elhigh's star is a black hole:
Gotcha.
I'd still insist this dude was far from that crowd. Unless chubby wanna be bikers missing digits are the "in crowd" in Canada.
@Cadavillac:
Maybe he traded for a bottle of tequila.
Nice red teg there. Who the hell lets someone test drive their car without being in it??? Not me, that's for sure. Not that that makes it okay to steal, but for reals, he was just asking for it.
Vehicles over 15 years old are allowed to be imported to Canada. A 91 Skyline GTR is worth about $10k wholesale if isn't too rusty. They're fairly common on the streets here. Would you allow someone to test drive it? Maybe not THAT particular clown, but for a car worth less than a base Chev Aveo, it probably wasn't a huge deal.
@Cadavillac: I read the original thread, and it said he lost those fingers in an accident in a Skyline - one he apparently actually owned. So he got bit, hard, by one, then stole another, to get bitten in another way. Probably not playing with a full deck - in more ways than one, now.
@tentacles: As I understand it, the guy had it at a dealership, too.. most dealers will let people test drive cars without riding along.
Stealin' when he shoulda been buyin'
For bonus humor, the infamous cap worn by this idiot is now for sale on eBay!
[cgi.ebay.com]
@dculberson: that makes sense. the article makes it sound like it was being sold by the owner.
Just to clear it up the car was being sold by a co-signment dealership. One of the funnier things about or is it aboot, is the kid paid for an expensive car wash, an oil change and a few other things while he had the car. Yea real rocket scientist...
I would never steal a car from someone name Ironside.
Aluminumside? Tinside? Sure. But shit, dude: iron?
Righteous.
The eBay auction is fantastic! It includes lots of "extras" and is itself worthy of a Jalopost.
@dolo54: Do you really want to be in the car with a total stranger driving? I don't.
As the kids say: PWNED!
@jdepould: Oh yeah. I've sold a few cars and have been. Never had a problem, except for one guy who answered his cell on the drive. He was driving well though so I didn't say anything. But it was a bit rude.
@Avitor: COTD
Too bad that the Ironside guy is wearing a Mercedes baseball hat in the eBay ad. Didn't he read about the no-nos of car apparel? Datsun would have been OK, Nissan not.
Glad to see fatty busted.
the car was actually on ebay last i checked (like 2 days ago)
haha throwing the horns is easy when yer missin' fingers. Is it really stealing or just not bringing back a car you had permission to drive?
Will he lose another finger now?