Jalopnik
It looks like Italy has been knocked off the PCH Superpower throne by the UK, according to the results of yesterday's Choose Your Eternity poll. That means that PCH SuperGigaPower France awaits the chance to take on its historical PCH rival from across the Channel. But first, let's see how Britain fares against a rival that, though falling somewhat short of true PCH Superpower status due to the stubborn reliability of so many of its vehicles, still puts forward some strong Hell Project competition. And, just to make things interesting, let's get our contestants from Canada, where an iron atom never found an oxygen atom it didn't want to establish a caring, lifelong relationship with. We can thank HoserDave for these tips, and of course a Project Car Hell Tipster T-shirt will soon be thrown into a dogsled and mushed all the way up to his igloo.
We had a Triumph GT6 just last week, but somehow that wasn't enough British Leyland Hell! Plus it sat for 23 years, which may have been just a little too challenging. So how about a GT6 that's only been sitting for 20 years? For a mere $2,000 (Canadian), this 1972 Triumph GT6 (which its seller describes as a "Good project car right out of Austin Powers the spy who shagged me") could fill your garage with dashed hopes and crushed dreams of roaring about town in your very own six-cylinder British sports car. The seller claims the body is in good shape, but there's some scary-looking damage around the windshield frame. The "Engine rebuilt before storing in 1988 long story," and we're betting that long story has plenty of twists and turns and confusing epilogues. Would it be sacrilege to suggest dropping a 2JZ-GTE in this thing?
Call it a Volkswagen, call it a Porsche, but a 914 by any name has great mid-engined hoonage potential. You can keep things all Porsche in the engine compartment, maybe even make it a homegrown 914-6, or you can stuff a wild Subaru boxer in there for some oversteeringly dangerous fun. The great thing about the 914 is that you won't have a posse of Porsche purists ready to string you up if you feel like, say, making a 914amino out of one. So head on up to London (no, the other London), where $2,500 Canadian dollars will buy you this 1973 Porsche 914. The seller states "project car lost interest," but you know you won't lose interest, right? Especially not with "all parts are here for it some new still in the package" and "new floors welded in already." Maybe it's just a matter of bolting on all the parts and roaring away! Or maybe not... actually, almost certainly not.
Comments
The GT6 ran like crap in almost new condition. I can't imagine what it can (or can't) do now! The Porsche parts can be had I guess...So I'm going for Moldy ole Brit!
I had go for the GT6...The Porsche you can end up with occasionally using....that GT6....well it is a Triumph.....enough said....and it is better lookig and will always make you feel like a doomed soul
That was too easy...Triumph in a landslide.
While the Triumph is a good looking car, I'd have voted for it, if it were a Spitfire. I'm going for the Porsche, because if it doesn't break in half with the targa off, I'm driving topless.
Mmm gt6. Don't forget, you can make a spitamino out of it.
The GT6 - lovely cars. That one looks ok as far as a project but I think the seller needs to lower the price.
easy peezy. 914's are a blast to drive, cheap to fix and have an active aftermarket. Triumphs are, well, British.
British Leyland = automatic PCH vote.
quick mental note: if it is british, its from hell.
only cars that are in general worse to work on are russian, or off main markets.
welcome to the PCH.
/going back to my MG midget now.
Triump with a v6turbo then catch my ass
Since the Triumph actually looks to have been stored inside, it may actually be almost reasonable. Then again, I could just be fazed by the idea that a German car could actually be as much hell as a British car.
Also, I suggest for the Triumph, carrying on the great tradition of melding British cars and American engines by dropping in the geograpically appropriate 302 Windsor (if it'll fit without too much banging on stuff).
Silly Jerry's when will they learn. 2 world wars later and they still don't know to stay away from GB.
Much like Max Mosley, I'm going with the potential British tragedy that is the GT6. What the hell is up with that roof? Talk about surviving a shit storm.
The 914 looks like the guy Tippi Hedren finds in the bedroom, with his eyes pecked out. But that's okay, look at that dash! With the exception of a bubble next to the binnacle it's uncracked and pretty pristine. The engine compartment also looks complete; so what if you have to replace everything because it's too old to use, at least you'll be able to match up the parts by sight.
At the end of the day you can lay claim to owning a "Porsche" with the 914, while the GT6 will elicit responses of "a what?"
I was going to vote for the Porsche since one of my neighbors has one with the flat four out of an Impreza 2.5 in it, that's a fun car.
But then I got to thinking about your 2JZ proposal. Just imagine the hell that would result from dropping one of them, tuned to 700+hp, into an old British Leyland. Yeah, you'll banish the Lucas electrics when you swap in the reliable Japanese mill, but enough boost can fix any worries of the car actually being reliable. The hoon-o-meter is off the chart if you then caminoed it.
Always wanted a 914. Actually, I always wanted to drop a Chevy 350 in the front of a 914 and call it a 914/8. I saw it in a magazine once. How hard could it be?
@JoeWoodsprite: I drove a 914 with a 350 in it once. Jeepers, was it fun! Didn't shift worth shit, but I think that had to do with the quality of the conversion, meaning there wasn't much.
Der Vaterland cannot win this battle. They cannot even compete.
You hardly need to put the Chevy V8 in the front of a 914. There is a kit out there to have it the proper mid position.
I'll take the 914 and drop a Subaru EJ20 turbo in. Easy power without the complexity of shoehorning in a crappy V8.
Just say no to British crapmobiles! Except a newer Lotus Elise or Exige.
@Maymar: Plenty of banging on stuff n would be required. Not just to make it fit, but to make it have any chance of holding together when you were done. The rear end and axles on these cars weren't exactly reliable with a ~100hp I6.
The spitfire/gt6 backbone chassis is pretty inconvenient for this kind of swap, since it necks down right where you want the transmission to be (unless you put the whole thing up higher or further forward than you would want to. Even a Datsun 5 speed gave me headaches there. The chassis also isn't terribly strong, even before you start cutting bits out.
Of course it can be done. That's what PCH is all about. However, my choice would be for a V6 or I4, and trust me, those are still plenty hellish.
I'll take the 914! Drop in a 3.0 or 3.6 911 engine and you have one of the best performing car today.
@graverobber- my star is on the inside: the GT6 will elicit responses of "a what?"
I was actually having a conversation with an acquaintance at a restaurant during a friend's birthday party and when the subject of ugly cars came up, I mentioned the Triumph TR7 -- and the other guy, mildly startled, responded "wait, Triumph made cars?"
@natepatrin: Sometimes we have to lower ourselves and converse with the great unwashed. I'll bet he thought Triumph was some kind of cologne.
Of course the discussion of rare and unusual sports cars is often a good point of entry into a conversation with the lovely ladies.
What I want to know is:
Did I ever tell you about when I put a slant-six in a Triumph?
British = Hell. Nuf said.
Q: Where are all the 5-star Cotomer Sevis reps?
A: They're in hiding.
Q: Why are they hiding?
A: They've found that they have new responsibilities.
Q: Like what?
A: Well, apart from keeping us plebs in place they have to ensure that their comments are witty and worthy.
Q: That's a tall order!
A: Yes. It's a stupid idea. We should all be equal idiots under Jalopnik.
Q: That woman in that Pontiac ad from a few days ago, was that really a woman?
A: The sands of time hold many mysteries. You don't want to go there sunbeam.
@jonrudd: Angry much?
@jonrudd: Seeing as Jalopnik's cotomer sevis is notoriously bad there isn't that much pressure. Now I just have to come up with a witty comment to finish off this post...
@jonrudd: Wow, another star reference. Remember, I didn't bring it up this time.
Can we get an orange star for UDMan?
Wow, the stars only appear when you mention them!
Triumph. The Porsche is orange and a bad, bad Porsche model--this seller got everything together for this hot project and then...just lost interest? What, for him it's the thrill of the hunt for parts? Doesn't bode well. Bored him. It will bore you. And other people, should you finish it.
With some sort of floors in place and what basically looks like a straight body, if nothing else the 914 could be made into a very nice track car, one of those that might show a lot of "real" Porsches how its done. People know how to sort these cars out, and parts are easy, especially if you don't mind fiberglass. So with a little bit of imagination and a lot of dollars you could actually have something cool.
So of course I voted for the Triumph.
England is always more hellish than Germany.
@ShastaMcNasty: Dude, perhaps you are unaware of a little thing called World War Two.
Please! No contest! The 914 - even with its "new floors" was a functional car when new. You just have to put it back together and it will go.
The TR6 was basically PCH new from the factory...and if you ever finish it (ha-ha) it will be a lovely vehicle to look at.
TR6...'nuff said.
Had to go with the GT6. I helped a friend restore one back when we were in high school. My first exposure to the hell that is Lucas. I wouldn't mind having that one myself. Oh I know it will drive me crazy, but that's a price I'm willing to pay.
Ahh, yes, another LBC with a straight six. Perhaps this would provide stiffer competition:
[raleigh.craigslist.org]
My first exposure to the Triumph GT6 came courtesy of one of my favorite high school English teachers. His was British Racing Green with a stripped-out interior, slot mags, and an open exhaust that made the car louder than any of his students' Camaros or Mustangs. Anyway, during my senior year, when I was his teacher's assistant, he was trying to sell it and I asked if he'd let me have it. He was absolutely horrified.
"First off, you'd probably get killed in it. Second of all, you'll spend all your time playing with the carbs instead of studying, so you'll flunk out of college. Third, your mother's active in the PTA. If I sold you that Triumph, she and the principal would put my head on a stake in the parking lot."
This was part of my early education in British cars. The moral of the story, obviously, was that a Triumph will drive you insane through anger, frustration and a lack of money. Just like a teaching job.
OMG I had both of these at one point or the other. . . All I can say is that I put 9 years in a hand-rebuilt GT6+ and it only left me stranded once, cluthc slave leaked out and left me with a disconnect between engine and transmission. . .
The 914, well two years $12K and a mere 3200mi later and I was cured of the old+funky+cheap=fun car buying bug ;)
So I have to go porsche, for the cure.
Thanks again! And I love Lucas so much I ripped him out of my 72 Mini and replaced him with some gold old Honda!
As someone said earlier, anything Lucas is an instant HELL!
@Armand, Star-Spangled Pedant: And that, young gents, is commenting of the sort that earns one star-spangled status.
Porch for me, by the way.
British Leyland can kiss my chocolat-ey starfish!
Never again will Lucas electrics ruin my weekend!
Sure there will be problems with my choice, but the fun part of PCH is the H.
Hell is for optimists. And you would have to be really positive person to think that 914 wouldnt be hell.
There will be Rust (look under that battery tray, I GUARANTEE it's there...
There will be an assortment of leaks, oil will be everywhere and when you start replacing seals, you will replace the wrong one.
and not to mention the sheer price of these parts, as there wont be anymore 914's in the boneyards like there used to be.
and then you think, 914-6 - I'll just swap in a 2.7 or 3.2 and a G50..ready to go.
Really, smart ass. Dont you think hell is seductive that way....
Deutschland Uber Alles!
Ugliest Porsche vs. truly hellish Brit.
It's like being back in high school and your best friend asks you "who you'd rather sleep with"; the sixty-year old librarian or that overweight art class hippo.
And you already know he'll call you a perv regardless of the outcome...
@thunder:
Hmmm. I know about the front porch (928/4/etc), and the back porch (911,12, etc) but what the hell is a mid porch?
I remember a jock about a local hobo out knocking on doors looking for work. One wealthy woman takes pity and tells him:
" There is some paint in the garage, why don't you paint the back porch"
The man says "okay" and disappears. He comes back abot two hours later and says "I am all done. Can I get paid? Oh, by the way, it was a Ferrari, not a Porsche."
The Porsche gets my vote, mostly because I used to live in the "other" London and have experienced the truly immense quantities of road salt that city likes to lay down. Granted Windsor's not very distant but London is just special that way.
- J
I had a friend in high school who drove a triumph. Miserable car.
He got tackled during gym class by a few guys from the football team because he was kidding around with them. I guess the jock was on him. Triumph FTW!
lol @ armand and "a Triumph will drive you insane through anger, frustration and a lack of money. Just like a teaching job."
as much as i love the hoonage potential of a WRX engine in a 914, triumph, like "french car," is synonymous with hell.