We did Cheap Ferrari Hell the other day, and that made me realize that we're overdue for Cheap Porsche Hell. Now, you can get your 914s, 924s, and 944s for next to nothing, and bargains on 912s can often be found. You can even find the occasional $1,000 928... but you need at least a 911 in your stable if you want to be able to look some Ferrari driver in the eye and brag about your Porsche. You've probably looked at the crazy prices for 911s and felt that there was no threat of one ever showing up in your garage, then breathed a sigh of relief. Not so fast- the shadow of a Hell Project 911 looms over you even now!
The more recent 911s are way faster than the older ones, of course, but there's something about the style of the early 911s that's hard to resist. Anyway, the power situation is easily remedied, simply by the application of geological levels of boost pressure. But a complete hippie-era 911 that you can actually afford? The answer is: Yes! Head on over to Philly for this 1971 911T (go here if the ad disappears), which can be yours for the brotherly-love price of only 3 grand. Sure, it needs some TLC and maybe some parts here and there, and it looks like good ol' oxide of iron might be a major factor in the project, but the seller says it's got "Complete matching numbers!" And that's about it for description; oh, sure, there's the "Not Running. Restore, project or parts car" bit as well, but that sort of goes without saying. We can assume from the rear sag that there's an engine- or maybe a few sacks of concrete- in the back, and all the glass seems to be there. What else do you need?
That '71 is quite a deal, of course, but maybe your irrational fear of rust makes you want to look for a 911 from a somewhat more arid location. Or perhaps your swingin' lifestyle calls for the open-air Malaise spirit of a targa-top-equipped car. Either way, those willing to pony up a miserly $4,200 could score this '76 911 Targa in Arizona (go here if the ad disappears). From the photos, you can tell that something is wrong with the front body; turns out there was a bit of a Porsche-versus-deer mishap. No problemo, right? Just get a new fender and associated bits and you're ready to go! Well, unfortunately, there's more to the story; as the seller describes it: "Car hit a deer on the front right and pulled into the grass, starting the engine compartment on fire." We find it somewhat unhelpful that there are no photos of the rear of the car (or the side that hit the deer, for that matter), so there's no way to see what kind of fire damage you'll be getting. However, the seller is throwing in "what is left of a 1978 eurospec SC targa, including the 3.0 engine" in addition to the burned engine. So you figure, hey, just fix the body damage, fix the fire damage, make one of the engines run, then fix all the other broken stuff... and you'll have quite the machine!