Commenter of the Day: ATV Nightmare Edition

Once again, Signore Loverman is off-duty for COTD today, and since he bought his first shotgun at the age of three, we won't inquire too closely about the reasons why he asked me to sub for him this fine Monday evening. Sometimes we give this award to the commenter who lasers straight to the core of a topic with his or her pithy one-liner, and sometimes the award goes to a commenter who writes a lengthy essay full of numerous hyperlinks to handy references, all done on the timeclock at The Man's salt mine. Today, however, the COTD award goes to a commenter who managed to fill our heads with twisted dream imagery that will take a while to purge from our gray matter...


I speak, of course, of Tanshanomi, whose depiction of his ATV of Calm Terror appeared in today's Question of the day. We'll let Tanshanomi take over here:

As a child of 5 or 6, I had a vivid dream in which a madman — driving what I can only describe as a giant, three-story-tall black ARGO or MAX 6-wheeled ATV topped with a flat deck and a white steamboat wheelhouse — was terrorizing my neighborhood. Well, sorta calmly terrorizing. He didn't crush anything, or kill anybody; he just kinda drove slowly down the middle of the street. But we were all really worried and scared anyway, because, hey, nobody shows up driving something like that unless they are a madman who's planning something really bad, right?
I ran to the back yard to hide and ducked into a shed I'd never noticed being there before. There was nothing inside except this big foot pedal sticking out of the ground. I didn't know what it did, but I somehow deduced that this might, perhaps be a secret lever that would make the big vehicle disappear. If I could make that thing disappear, I would save my family and be a hero. So, I decided to give it a shot and stomped on it with all my might. Unfortunately, as I did, my brain caused my leg to jerk (for real) and the twitch in my leg caused me to wake up. I've always felt a little cheated by that. After all, it was right at the climactic moment of the dream.
I've wondered ever since what that pedal in the ground really did.


We'll never see those happy little ATVs (or mystery control pedals) the same way again. Nice work, Tanshanomi!