What costs six figures, produces 516 lb-ft of torque and looks like something Chris Bangle once scribbled on a cocktail napkin? Exactly, it's the BMW 7-Series in Alpina B7 trim. And for a limited time, you can own one at an interest figure lower than that introductory, adjustable-rate number you got from the shady mortgage broker behind the train station. Of course, with your house now going on the forclosure block, you'll need a place to stay. May we recommend the Alpina B7, which for a limited time you can get at up to 60 months at 3.9 percent. And if you had any equity left in that pressboard Mc Mansion the bank now owns, you could cut your living expenses in half. If you already own a 6- or 7-Series BMW, you can opt for $3500 in cash back in lieu of the financing deal. That way, you can load the trunk with Top Ramen and hot sauce. [Edmunds]

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