Looks like Canada beats Italy in yesterday's Project Car Hell poll, though not by what we'd call a decisive margin. But that was yesterday, with yesterday's priorities; today we're going to honor Jalopnik Pimp Week by posing a Pimpmobile Dilemma for your voting pleasure!
Let's say your lifestyle suggests- nay, demands- a seriously pimpin' ride; failure will make you a laughingstock at the Hustler's Convention. However, it's not just a case of buying yourself a Stutz Diplomatica, because you are trapped in Project Car Hell! You must select one of two somewhat, er, challenging vehicles as the starting point for your pimptastic machine. Bonus points for describing exactly how you'd go about applying some pimp magic to your chosen ride. Remember, you must out-pimp the mighty Diplomatica!
It's a shame that GM cars seem to have the upper hand in the Detroit pimpmobile world, because Ford has made some excellent pimp-ready rides as well. Say, this 1990 Bill Blass Edition Lincoln Mark VII, for example. This one has a "deacent" (sic) body, all the glass is "great," and it comes with the same HO 5.0 used in the hot Mustangs of the era, so you'd be able to lead The Man on some righteous high-speed chases with it. What's the catch, you ask? Well, like most Mark VIIs, the air suspension isn't quite working right, so it suffers from the "Lincoln Sag" in the rear. It needs a battery (and those with a suspicious turn of mind might say that the electrical woes probably go far beyond the battery), and Mr. Blass' interior isn't quite as nice as it once was. But it's only $1500, which is clearly just the starting point for downward price negotiation, leaving you plenty of cash left over for metalflake paint, gold plating, and a mink headliner.
But you know, if it ain't got Fine Corinthian Leather, it ain't pimpin', we alway say (really, we're always saying that around the Jalopnik office). That's why we've got this amazing 1981 Chrysler Cordoba for you. It's got two-tone paint, it's got Ricardo Montalban's Seal of Approval, and it's only $600! Best of all, it comes equipped with the pimpgasmic fake cabriolet option! Yes, Chrysler made this car with a roof that looks just like a real convertible top, yet is made of solid, immobile steel. On the minus side, the seller doesn't know if it runs (we're betting it doesn't), he doesn't have a title, and the tags expired five years back. It's not gonna be easy to get this thing into full pimpmobile shape, but then pimpin' ain't easy.