Perusing the latest issue of Top Gear I came across Jeremy Clarkson's column in which he tries to identify the perfect car. What gave him the idea? He'd just taken a ride in an RS4 Avant. Sure, a few sentences later ye olde Jezza determines that the hyperkinetic Deutsch wagon is not perfect. But, check out his gripes: there's no knee room in the back seat and it costs too much. Ahem. Here in the Jalopnik Fantasy Garage (we're filthy rich!) price is simply not an issue. And if we had someone tall behind us, we'd simply toss him or her the keys to any one of our 49 other Fantasy rides. Case closed. In my mind the RS4 Avant is not only the perfect car, but also this week's JFG nominee.
As a penalty for living in America, I've never driven an RS4 Avant. That's because there aren't any. Luckily Audi was gracious enough to entrust me with a blazing blue RS4 sedan about a year back. I haven't stopped thinking about it since. There's a mental game I play when I'm bored. I shut my eyes and imagine driving. Pure, unadulterated driving. My hands on the wheel, my feet on the pedals, the feel of the stick as it clicks through the ratios. The sensation of speed, the roar of the motor, the rush of the brakes and of course the side-crushing inertia from throwing it all sideways. Other cars do very well in my petrolhead mental gymnastics. Chief among them, Mazda's new Miata, a Porsche 911 4S (997) and any number of bollocks-cracking Lotus Seven facsimiles. But the RS4 simply beats them all. To death.