What goes down when you put a bit too much wonga in the pockets of a couple of yobs and then let 'em loose? Why, they drop 10,000 quid on building the world's longest Scalectrix track at Dunsfold Airfield (is there a more famous 747 in the world besides Air Force One or Pan Am 103?) and invite the people from Guinness to officiate. The racing action isn't exactly heart-in-throat-inducing, but what we wouldn't give for that amount of track and a couple of scantily-clad corner marshals. The mind? It boggles.

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